I called my best-friend a queer...?

Sadly, this is one of those cases that you have to be patient about. Things won't get better -- or start to feel better, for that matter -- until your friend is ready to sit down and have a heart-to-heart talk with you. Maybe you can finally tell her about your orientation, but letting her know you like her (for the past two years!) will be harder and probably take a longer time.